• We recently sent out a mailing of postcards. Did you know that when you mail postcards, the evil government monopoly Post Office places a sticker over your headline? We do.

• We're working on an exciting new project for a company that does business on the "internet."

• Our work for a humorless MegaCorporation was sure painful, but at least they paid their bills.

•Former intern John Mayer continues to be famous, and is kicking our collective bum financially. We demand justice.

•The SSA office has been checked, and no evidence of WMD were found.

• Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Unless you die today, in which case it was the last day.